Minnie Me?

Overheard in the car this morning:

Sophia (on her “cell” phone): “Ugh! I can’t believe it!”
Us: “What’s the matter Soph?”
S: “They want me to come down and go to that doctor’s appointment. But that’s not my job! I’m not a Doctor, I’m an ARTIST, people!”

Priceless. Thought it’d give you a chuckle.
What are some of your favorite overheards? Need not be kid related.

21 thoughts on “Minnie Me?

  1. Jason

    I was teaching pentatonic scales in my music class yesterday. I said, “A pentagon has five sides.” A 5th grade student stumped me. “No, because the pentagon building has 6 sides,” he said, knowingly.

  2. sharolyn

    Once my daughter was making conversation with another little girl at Borders. “What is your name?” she asked. “Ellie,” responded the girl (sounds like L-E).

    “What’s your name?” she asked my daughter.

    “c-a-m-i-l-L-E”.

  3. Josiah Mory

    Um Jason, the Pentagon does only have five sides….don’t let 5th graders get a jumpstart on thinking they’re smarter than you they have another 5 years before they hit that stage.

  4. chad

    For years, we’ve listened as one of our kids informed us of something, then they’d turn and walk away, having informed us of something very important.

    One of us will lean in close, and finish the sentence with a whispered… “Dumbass.”

  5. sharolyn

    Non kid-related: In the midst of a national conversation about how involved government should be in our lives, the most absurd thing I have heard from someone who was not kidding…

    “I’ve been on food stamps and welfare. Did anybody help me out? No!” -Craig T. Nelson, “Coach”

    This for me goes in the category of if-you-don’t-laugh-you’ll-go-insane.

  6. sharolyn

    “We need burritos NOW. Hurry!”
    -James into the Dora cash register mic tonight

    Where is everyone?

  7. sharolyn

    Yeah, at U2 concerts or whatever. (jealous kid inner voice) This is way better. Right.

    I don’t know if this counts as a quote, but sometimes Jason calls in the middle of a song. This time it was right before he played the bass line from “Beat It.” Have you ever heard a bass trombone playing Beat It over the phone during a live performance? I am wiping tears of laughter.

    Gretchen, this post could go on for years for me. But I’ll stop. I promise. Don’t everyone interrupt at once. (crickets chirping)

  8. aly hawkins

    We sometimes do our pets’ voices and make them say funny things. Hazel’s is that of a jaded junior-high girl who thinks everything is stupid. Pearl sounds like a depressed, middle-aged 1950s housewife with severe social anxiety disorder. Lucy is an ADD second-grader.

    I’m absolutely willing to share some of the hilarious things we have made them say. Will that count?

  9. Heidi

    This story is on behalf of Christy and Daniel Semsen.

    Their adorable autistic son Noah has a therapist that goes to school with him. The therapist (Gloria) watches Noah and makes sure he doesn’t do things that he is learning not to do (be really fidgety, stare off into space, etc). When he’s good, Gloria reports back and Noah gets to play video games that evening. When he’s bad, Gloria reports back and that means no Wii for Noah. (Which, obviously, is a fate worse than death.)

    One day, Christy was driving with Noah in the backseat after school and he asked if he could play video games. This is the conversation that followed:

    Christy: No Noah, I’m sorry, but Gloria said you were bad today. No video games.
    Noah: What? Mom, I want to call Gloria.
    (note – Noah was 5 and had never used a phone)
    Christy: Sure, why not?
    (dials the phone and hands it to Noah)
    Noah: Hello? Gloria? What I want to say is… WHAT THE HECK?? Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Ok.

  10. Gretchen Post author

    While stepping on to a crowded elevator at Kaiser today; Sophia: “We’re here for my mom. Not for us. She has a thing on her arm she wants the doctor to look at. Hopefully she won’t need a shot. ” -Thanks Soph :)

  11. sharolyn

    My son, who often shows drummer tendencies, this morning:

    “I’m a good drummer because I’m a boy.”

    (His mother smacks her forehead and shakes head.)

  12. Gretchen Lee

    I told this to Chad already- but it was cute:
    Sophia: Mom, did you fall in love when you were 5?
    Me: No sweetie, I was 21 when I fell in love.
    Sophia: Oh, well I’m only 4 but I love Zion.

    And so it begins.

  13. sharolyn

    -driving-

    Camille: Mom, what does Emmanuel mean?

    Me: It means God with us. God wanted to be friends with us, so he sent Jesus. Jesus is God, but also a person, so he knows how we think and feel, and people could ask him questions…

    Camille: -MOM, GRINCH DECORATIONS!

  14. sharolyn

    As the great Gary Cole said as Mike Brady in The Brady Bunch Movie, “I’m glad we had this talk.”

  15. june

    “I just met you and I love you!”

    (No, not from “Up,” from when Brian and I met/married…yes, fast enough to merit a slash.Happy anniversary babe!)

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