Zack, this is the most satisfying thing I’ve heard in a very long time. Welcome to middle age, m’love. I knew I was screwed when we went to “Beatlemania” in the 80s, and during intermission, some 9-year-old kid in front of us says to his dad, “So John was the one on the drums, right, Dad?”

Ouch.

Is that a Gavin DeGraw reference? Nice… Yeah, when I lived in NYC, I used to see him every Thursday night at Wilsons on the Upper East Side. Typically, there were about 12 people there, each one shaking his/her head, saying. “Dude. Why isn’t this guy signed yet?” And then one night, Gavin and some of us are drinking post-show, and he says he got the call from Clive Davis. Whoa… No more $5 shows at Wilsons…

I’m not cool, by any stretch of the imagination. My typical Friday night involves building IKEA furniture and/or sipping Maker’s Mark while reading Wired magazine. But a million years ago, I spent most of my money on drink minimums and covers, and tried to see/hear every Next Big Thing I could.

But as I get older, I go back to the same Afghan Wigs records over and over again. I pull out the first Brad album and get nostalgic. I can listen to August And Everything After by Counting Crows for another million years straight.

What the hell happened? New music excites me every once in a while, but I honestly feel like I don’t have the time or inclination to search for it anymore. The Decemberists, The New Pornographers, and maybe a few others have really blown my mind recently, and I’m sure they’ll remain favorites for decades to come. But I just don’t get moved by 20-year old kids with guitars anymore. Maybe I can’t relate. Maybe we’re becoming our fathers; poorly singing Mama’s And The Papa’s lyrics while the kids cover their ears in the backseat.

I love my friends. I love that they hinge their happiness on their ability to create. In a way, I’m jealous that they still create, as my guitars have been reduced to mere wall decoration. But my respect and admiration have little to nothing to do with their music. I don’t like my friends more if their band is better than the other guys band.

I think I’m just gonna have to live with it. That’s fine. It’ll be a constant reminder that I myself should be slinging an instrument, sending out mass emails for my show at (insert local coffee shop here).

He is their chariot.

I’m curious why you’re deemed so important, though. I mean, you’re a funny writer, way funny, and a cool guy. But that alone doesn’t get you IN to these supa-cool shindigs. What else you got up your sleeve, in your boot, down your pants?

Cerise

[quote post="1153"]So what does Get Signed v2.0 look like?[/quote]

I can give the short version from my perspective… I’ll post the long version if Corey decides to make a post. My band has national distribution set up for this fall, a single currently on Christian Rock Radio (not an oxymoron, I promise… there are at least 15 stations across the country), we’re on iTunes, we’ve played from Colorado to Michigan to Texas to North Carolina, and we have NO record label.

We decided there’s no reason we can’t spend 1/5 of a label’s budget and make a commercial-quality album (especially with a straight-ahead guitar rock band) and then just keep the proceeds. Plus, there is no “creative interference” from the record label (for better or worse, and no offense to any A&R types reading this, but it’s mostly for better). Our management has done a good job of hooking us up with publicists, radio promoters, and distributors, and our connections with local producers makes a label obsolete for our purposes.

Oh yeah, except we spent the money for the album on a new van to replace the one that caught fire in Louisiana this summer. So we’re at the moment promoting vaporware… anyone have $10K they’re looking to make disappear? You’ll get your picture on the front of the CD…

Corey, please repost this as your first official post. I’d love to get a groupthink going on this topic.

There’s gotta be a new way to do the band thing. Lining up like livestock to go on at the Roxy, just so you can play to the crowd (read: family) of the kids playing after you and the jaded sound guy is an effing joke. So maybe Van Halen and The Doors played The Whiskey. Those days feel like they’re gone.

So what does Get Signed v2.0 look like?

Sorry to hijack yer thread, Z. Here’s the answer: laugh and feel just a little sliver of arrogance that even if you happen to be wasting your time that night elsewhere, at least it won’t have a shitty soundtrack.