Now Hiring

Careful kids, here comes a rant:

I work for a Picture Vehicle company. Film and Television productions call us when they need a specific vehicle for their shoot. We source the right vehicle, and deliver it to the set. About a month ago, I placed an ad on Craigslist, looking for a part-time delivery driver, who possesses a valid class-A drivers license. (A Class-A allows the driver to operate a semi-truck, and a 3-car trailer)

In the original ad, I specified the requirements to be considered for the position. Additionally, I asked that applicants DO NOT attach a resume of any kind, or their resume would be immediately deleted. Who wants viruses? Not me.

Everyday, I get at least one applicant who attaches a resume. I reply with the following:

“Thanks so much for submitting your application. While we appreciate your interest in the position, we are not going to consider you for the job. Your failure to follow simple directions demonstrates your inability to perform the job we’re hiring for. Had you included your resume within the body of your email as directed, you would have been considered for the position. We understand that you may have formatted a standard email that you send to all potential employers which includes your resume as an attachment. If that’s the case, we would rather not hire someone who is simply “fishing” for a job, rather than seeking the one that suits them. Good luck in your job search, and thank you for your time and understanding.”

Firm, to the point, and sincere. I don’t want to crush anyone’s spirit. So they screwed up – big deal. We all screw up, right? I can understand all that…

What I don’t understand, are spelling errors. I know, I know…no one likes a spelling Nazi. I’m sure there are a bunch of spelling errors in this post. But this post is not my first introduction to a person who may have money to give me. (Or is it….hi Mike!) Here’s a verbatim excerpt from an applicant. I received this about 10 minutes ago – hence the diatribe:

“I just got out of the military with an honarable discharge and am currently in the navy reserves. I am looking for an employment oportunity to allow my skills and interest to grow/ develop. Even if I am not suitible for the origional job aplied for, please consider me for other possitions with your company. Thank You.”

I’m not sure what is more frightening: That this guy’s spelling is so crap-tastic, or that the US Government thinks he has the mental aptitude required to possess assault rifles and grenades. (Or some huge-ass boat, as his case may be) Either way, I am not giving this tool a job.

I know I’m not hiring a rocket scientist or a brain surgeon. I’m hiring some dude who can drive a truck. But it bugs the hell outta me, anyway.

Rant over.

PS – If you’re thinking about buying a 1960′s Fiat 500, but you don’t want to look like a cartoon character – forget it. Talk about losing all my street cred – look at this picture: (Yeah, my job rules….)
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