Ash’s folks came up for the afternoon today, to hang out and get a gander at the bitchen furniture they got us for Christmas, which now resides in our living room. It was terrific to see them, but it made me miss my parents, who now live 2,000 miles away…which is actually closer than when they lived in Kenya, but you know…it’s not like you can just drop by or meet halfway in Malibu for dinner.
The generational migratory patterns of Americans are strange. If you think about it, my parents’ generation was the first in history to scrap the assumption that where you were born was where you’d end your days. Before that, you maybe went away to college, but then you came back home and took over the family business. There were exceptions, of course–military families, mass emigrations from Europe due to famine–but for the most part, when someone said, “Where ya from?” you didn’t have to think too hard about the answer.
But not the Boomers, man. I had moved 7 times by the time I was nine years old, with 4 different elementary schools in the mix…and that was before we moved overseas and I was shucked off to boarding school. (Just a little joke, Mom, in case you’re reading this.) Since then, my folks have relocated 4 more times and will be moving to a [hopefully] permanent residence in the spring, and I have drifted in and out of more living environments than I can actually count. The condo we bought almost 2 years ago is the longest I have lived in any one place in 15 years. That is weird…but I wouldn’t trade it, since I can’t really imagine the alternative.
For me, all this packing and unpacking has resulted in two warring compulsions: I long to put down roots in a community where I know everybody and we boss each others’ kids, drop in unannounced, and vote for each other for local public office; and I also get the itch to pack it all up and shove off for maybe not greener, but definitely different, pastures right about the time it’s getting interesting. I don’t know how to reconcile these polar instincts.
Karen 8:19 pm on 12 February 2006 Permalink
I can completely understand where you are coming from. It is so strange being in Tn where there are so many families that have lived here their entire lives. I was a military brat that lived in 8 different states (including overseas) before 4th grade. Bobby on the other hand lived in Oregon from the time he was 5 until he came down to APU moving from an apartment to a house and moving to another house not far away. I am the one who gets restless and ready to go because of my past moving. Maybe someday we will feel like we are in the right place to stay for much longer. We have been here 4 and 1/2 years and I am ready to go!
I would love to see your new furniture! :0)
Gretchen 10:57 pm on 12 February 2006 Permalink
My mom moved about 20 times before getting married out of college. Growing up moving all the time, she definitely wanted roots dug down deep when my parents married. Well they were planted, and have dug down very deep. Now after 37 years in my childhood home (my only home before college) my parents are pulling up those roots and moving to Washington. It’s hard both for my mom and I’m realizing for me as well. No matter how often Mike and I move (3 times in the last 6 years) I always think of “home” as my parent’s home where I can go to at Christmas and other times and be completely comfortable.
I am realizing more and more as I grow older though that it isn’t the building that makes it home, it definitely is the people. I mean don’t get me wrong, I want a nice building for Mike and I :) to be our next home, and I’d love for Sophia to know the neighborhood kids and run into her teachers at the grocery store and think it’s funny. Dream a little dream…
Kyle 12:31 am on 13 February 2006 Permalink
I’m with you. Thinking about monastic vows of stability more and more. But it doesn’t do me too much good if everyone else is moving around all the time…
Stick 10:11 am on 13 February 2006 Permalink
I have to think that moving around is very good for broadening one’s world view. Especially for you who’ve had the opportunity to live outstide this country.
I grew up in one spot, but travelled enough as a kid to not be intimidated by the thought of moving across the country. I left school and went to D.C., then Nashvegas, then LA, and now Northern California, where we’re hoping to stay for awhile to do as you guys have said, let the kids grow up seeing their teachers around town (which we do… it’s a pretty small town).
That said, if we found someplace that we liked better than where we are, we might be up for a change…
michael lee 10:29 am on 13 February 2006 Permalink
Have you considered Long Beach?
Just asking …
Stick 11:06 am on 13 February 2006 Permalink
Um, yeah. We’ll put that one on the list to consider.
Morphea 12:32 pm on 13 February 2006 Permalink
I was shucked off to that boarding school, too [cool word choice, Al. Shucked. Shucked. I feel like an ear of corn], so I have the same itchy feet. However, Seattle is the shiznit and we seem to be feeling OK with living here for a while. It’s been 2.5 years already…
If we moved anywhere, it would be to Southern Europe or California.
june 6:45 pm on 15 February 2006 Permalink
Here’s to overseas living experiences at a young, impressionable age! Our family lived in Venezuela for a year when I was nine. Such experiences can help with the formation of one’s worldview enormously. I guess that’s a given…I just like to drop in and state the obvious from time to time.
Mike, how ’bout rather than us moving to Long Beach, you and Gretchen and Sophia come north?! Just asking. (Heck, YA’LL should come! It’s the promised land I tell ye!)
michael lee 6:59 pm on 15 February 2006 Permalink
June, feel free to drop in and state the obvious whenever you’d like.
Moving north sounds great … just give me about 10 years to get a master’s in composition at USC, followed by a Doctorate, and secure tenure, then I’ll be ready to start looking around for a gig up north.
june 7:39 pm on 15 February 2006 Permalink
The In-N-Out here is hiring.
michael lee 9:21 pm on 15 February 2006 Permalink
that’s basically the same thing.
Morphea 9:45 am on 16 February 2006 Permalink
June, where’s “North”? Because if Mike and Gretchen and Sophia moved to, say, Seattle, I’d be overjoyed.
Cerise
june 2:30 pm on 16 February 2006 Permalink
“North” meaning north of the central CA valley. I’m utterly CA-centric at this point. Not that all the Thai and seafood, space needle, glorious (once annual) views of Mt. Rainer and all aren’t just dandy, but as previously mentioned, I’m scarred from a childhood of neverending rain and thus, “north,” in my mind, stops at Mt. Shasta. So……if/when you tire of scraping the moss off your roof, your patio, your person, do come south!