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faith and theology

A Slice of Something.

  • faith and theology
  • life
By Chad ⋅ September 20, 2005 ⋅ Post a comment

A week ago monday, I finished reading this, Blue Like Jazz: Nonreligious Thoughts on Christian Spirituality which I greatly enjoyed. Upon using this to search for more information on Donald Miller, I stumbled upon this which lead to this and then lead me to the wonder that is Slice of Laodicea.

“The Slice,” is it is called, is the quasi (more on that later) blog run my Ingrid Schlueter, who has hosted the show Crosstalk on the VCY America radio network for 18 years. As I began reading, my Recovering Evangelical Crap-O-Meter began pinging into red or what the locals call, “Full Hinn Mode.” The site has quite a range of information ranging from amusing to really amusing.

Now remember when I promised to continue to post in anger and then feel guilty about it? Well, I spouted off pretty good and made it clear in no uncertain terms that I felt that most of the talkbackers were full of this word. Now, because of hot headed young men from Southern California who often pelt her site with obscenity, all talkbacks are held for Ingrid’s approval. As I mentioned before, I always feel guilty after I unleash anger upon anyone, so I sent her an email asking her to please disregard my posts. It wasn’t quite an apology, but it was close as we were gonna get.

We exchanged a couple of emails and I convinced her to allow me to post, one of which can be seen here . Now… a couple of days after I started successfully posting, this thread shows up. I am under no impression that I alone am responsible for this, but she actually refers to me. I’m the “poker.” I told her in an email that I wanted to poke at her and her readers. Stop thinking that you perv… you know what I mean. Please don’t get me started on how funny I think is that it smells like a blog, looks like a blog, reads like a blog, but it’s really a butterfinger bar. Which is private property, by the way.

It’s around this time that all of my posts and emails start disappearing into Blog Shiole, where there is weeping, wailing, gnashing of teeth, and the furious clicking of keys. Now… I am cool with being ignored, but here’s the problem: she regularly allows comments to go through that are unfounded and outrageous. The one that set me off was from a lady named Carol. Carol states in no uncertain terms on this thread that Southern California Mega Churches probably allow homosexuals on their deacon boards.

What Carol obviously does not know is that not only do most Southern California Mega Churches not allow homosexuals on their deacon boards, most of them don’t know what a deacon board is! It’s just a totally unfounded statement and stands, at this moment, unchallenged.

So why bother? I dunno. Why climb Mt. Everest? Because it’s there and it’s pissing you off. The Slice seems to exist solely for trashing Rick Warren and the Purpose Driven machine. I, myself, have issues with Pastor Warren. I find acronymns silly and he uses them while talking with foreign heads of state. He likes tempos above 140 BPM at all times on Sunday morning, and I like music that doesn’t suck. He tithes 90% and lives on 10% and I am a greedy wastrel who likes this and this too much. You can start to see the contrast.

Here’s my point : I think that Ingrid and her homies have elevated personal taste into the realm of Biblical Truth. The fact that the writing of Don Miller appeals more to my sensibilities then Rick Warren does not elevate one man above the other, it only means that Don Miller gets my $10.77 and Rick will have to make due with only 21,999,999 copies sold (Now available in Portuguese!! Get your copy today) I think both men love Jesus very seriously, and I, for one, am glad that they’re both out there working for the same God I am.

Here’s what breaks my heart. I think Ingrid Schlueter is also working for The God Yahweh, His Son Jesus the Christ, and HIs Holy Spirit, as we are. I want to believe so badly that He can use the both of us, as well as Rick and Don, for His kingdom. I want to believe that we can disagree with one another and still pray fervently for one another. I want to believe that our dialog can be indeed robust, founded in scripture, and sharp as a knife, not dumb as a bag of wet hair.

So, as long as Mike keeps paying his bills, I bellow an invitation from this blue line to Addison Road, where everyone’s voice will be heard, given consideration, and engaged. Lurking behind these computer screens are sharp minds (sharper then mine at least), big hearts, and distinct voices. Mindless, spineless regurgitation is discouraged, and will be lovingly poked at with sticks.

Post at your convenience, I know I will.

Chad

P.S. I also want to believe that the Dodgers can be the 2005 World Champions of Major League Baseball, but that’s not looking so hot. So, I really hope this whole peace and unity within the Body of Christ thing works out.

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Discussion

33 comments for “A Slice of Something.”

  1. Welcome to the blog, Chad. I’m thrilled to be your megaphone. I’ve said it before and will repeat if as often as I can; I view this place as a public square, and as long as it’s not illegal, immoral, illogical, unsubstantiated, hyper-calvanistic, post-feminist, poorly worded, intellectually flacid, written in german, a link to an adult themed site, too progressive, unkind, purpose-driven, narratival, pro-bush, irresolvable, non-foundationalist, written by Phil Johnson the Pyromaniac, a collection of recipes, marxist, a pop-culture reference, unfunny, dull-witted, unflattering pictures from my bachelor party, boring, or misspelled, then I’m going to publish it!

    New ideas may be good, they may be bad, they may be deeper truths, they may be old deceptions, but in all cases, may we never flee them!

  2. hey! thanks for the shout out…

    But seriously- get out while you still can! You may not yet be fully addicted- there may still be hope…

    But personally, I’m amazed that somehow you got Ingrid to not only allow your comments (for awhile), but to even allow one where you told them they were “full of shit”!!!
    I don’t know what Jedi Mind Trick you’all have over there at Addison Road, but I want to get me some :)

    Anyway, run away! In the end, Slice will give you only heartache and frustration- they are quickly moving to a “Remnant” theology and the number included in the “remnant” seems to get smaller by the day…

  3. Um, wow. How cool is it that you’ve been branded a heretic who enters into theological and cultural conversations purely for the satisfaction of “entertaining your friends”?? Clearly, that is the only reason you would disagree with Ingrid. Not because she’s off base. Never that.

    I learned my lesson about 6 months ago on Emergent No. It was right about then that my hair started going white, so I decided to call it quits.

  4. Bob,

    Thanks for then encouragement. I feel a great weight lifted this morning. I would like to clarify one point: as it clearly states in paragraph three, sentence three of my Illiad length post, She held it and didn’t allow it to go through. Anyone who gets “Full of Skubala” onto Ingrid’s site will indeed be a true Jedi, but I am still one of those little kids who got killed by Darth Whinypants.

    I think I am done ranting about her now… they’re just so prolific in their insanity that it will take too much energy to summon outrage for much longer. We Laodecieans are slackers.

  5. Let me see if I’ve got this right. The prooftexting, fist-waving members of Slice of Laodicea are calling you and people like you, um, aberrant, the Spirit of The Enemy in the Garden of Eden (ooo. That one’s got some drama), subversive, heretical, etc, etc. Poor Chad. You sounded, truly, like one of the levellest heads in the comment section. I’m sure you read the comments after her big announcement. The whole thing descended into a big, happy, spiritually masturbating circle jerk. Sorry if I offend. Don’t know how else to put it.

    It’s funny, Emergent No, which had long held its place in my heart as the craziest Fundies on the web, sound like mature, educated and sober individuals compared to these cats. I’m avoiding them both like de plague. [gasp] the WICCA are sending volunteers to help Katrina victims!!! Jesus, NOOOOOOOO!

    One other thing - this is part of the reason why I’m not sure I belong on christian blogs at all. I don’t even have a PROBLEM with gay couples uniting in marriage. “Go to it, boys!” I say. I know there are more politically liberal christians on the web who agree with me, but I haven’t found them yet. And I’m not sure how useful I am to serious discussions if I’m always waving my pretty rainbow flag. Which I will be doing until I die.

    Oh, well. Chad, my husband’s going to love you. Not in that way. Heck, I love you. Not in THAT way, either.

    Cerise

  6. Full of Bantha poo-doo.

  7. Morphea,

    See, here’s the thing about what I hope this site will become: I’m not sure I agree with you about gays and marriage. I consider myself a friend to gays and lesbians, in that I consider myself a friend to all bipeds. My inclusion of that particular tidbit was simply to illustrate the fraud that’s passing for fact over there.

    I would love nothing more then to have a robust, spirited, loving discussion on gay marriage and gays in the church, being personally undecided on the former and definitely in favor of the latter. I don’t wave a rainbow flag, and I am not quite prepared to depart from my conservative upbringing entirely. But my mind is open and my heart is soft.

    Oh, and your husband can love me any way he chooses. Is he hot?

  8. He is. Hoo boy.

    My darling Chad, you are just the sort of christian (or, you know, PERSON) I like best in the world. My parents and brother are not rainbow-flag-wavers (in fact, they’re a good deal less willing than you to even consider it), either, but like you, they don’t let opinion and/or conviction ever get in the way of their demonstrating love for any and all people. Which I respect so very much. More even than people with liberal sensibilities who themselves are intolerant of a conflicting opinion to theirs. That’s me, all too often.

    I’m sorry, I wasn’t trying to focus attention on gay marriage - I understood that you were just relaying an example of Slice’s difficulty getting their facts right. And do they ever. I was more nervously discussing my own hesitation of being a woo-woo, one world liberal (who also happens to regularly and enthusiastically attend church twice a week) on what is definitely a Christian blog. Since it’s abundantly clear I can’t keep my trap shut about topics dearest to my heart.

    Here’s the thing. I get on websites like Emergent No and Slice of Thingy and go, “Where’s the love, man?” Really. No loving responses to the lost who get on and comment? Yours was truly the most loving voice I heard there. And since you and those like you live HERE, here’s where I’ll stay. Until I get thrown out, of course. [grin]

    Cerise

  9. I can’t post in German anymore? There goes 4 years of high school, completely wasted! Man tu das nicht!

    I also loved Blue like Yazz (I believe it’s a “soft” j). Tweaked my Baptist background in an uncomfortable and yet somehow just right way.

  10. Scheisse. Yes, I, too was nervously eyeing Michael’s list. My posts fall into many of his banned criteria. However, he is a gracious fellow and I hope to get a few more subversive and heretical blogs in before he and Aly and Chad decide that I’m just here to erode their faith. Oh, wait. That was Slice of Thingy, not Addison Rd.

    Cerise

  11. the list of banned topics is fixed and inerrant. And in no way culturally predicated.

  12. [laughing] Funny man.

  13. Laugh. Out. Loud.

    Coughing. Still Grinning.

    Morhpea,

    Thanks for your kind words, your family sound cool.

    I would hate to see homosexuality, or abortion, or oil prices, or emo music, or the bullcrap that Shakespere in Love beat Saving Private Ryan for best picture, or… whatever, become the complete focus of AddisonRD.com. But we shouldn’t be afraid of them either.

    Saving Private Ryan is one of the greatest movies in American history, and while I enjoyed Shakespere in Love quite a lot, Joseph Finnes needs to get shot in the ass by Tom Hanks for that bullcrap-Miramax-political palace coup.

    End of discussion, next topic.

  14. [laughing harder] Stop saying funny things, people. I’m supposed to be working here.

    No more levity until 5pm Pacific Time.

    That is all.

    Cerise

  15. God, I love my friends.

    Chad, I can’t believe you’re still upset about A SEVEN YEAR OLD OSCAR RACE. Get over it, man.

  16. We need to teach Morphea the “Humor humor humor” song.

  17. Teach me the humor SONG, or teach me to have a sense of humor?

    Good luck on the latter. Better people have tried and failed.

    Cerise

  18. hey man- you should check the Donald Miller post on Slice again because she did post your comment with the s*h*i*t* word in it! I think just to point out how “potty mouthed” emergents are, but still…

    I think it’s a pretty wild accomplishment! I’ve been reading for months and never saw anyone else get away with that!

  19. Wow. I hadn’t seen that. I actually kind of regret the post, not so much for the use of the naughty word so much as not really having a point and writing while I was pissed off. When I wrote that, I hadn’t really read much of The Slice… I was just gut shooting and defending my boy.

    Oh well… it is a little funny.

  20. I went to that site a few times. I even commented one or twice. They never saw the light of day, of course. Apparently it was negative and “abusive” of me to comment on the absurdity of Ingrid’s stamp of approval on a site comparing the Purpose Driven Movement to THE HOLOCAUST (I kid you not) or to say that her condemnation of Starbucks (for a quote on one of their cups supporting homosexuality) might be no different than me condemning her for using an email address from Gmail/Google, a company which profits from the ad revenue of pornography. But no one on the internet (least of all Christians) are ever wrong. Didn’t you get the memo?

    Of course, if you’re going to be wrong and extreme in your viewpoints, at least BE CONSISTENT. Delete comments that don’t agree with you. Allow comments that do, even if they’re unfounded or ridiculous or hateful. And, always, remeber to hate Rick Warren and tear down your fellow believers IN LOVE.

    I don’t have time to waste on sites like that.

  21. Yes, you ought to waste your time here in the presence of the mad, the enlightened, the whimsical and the very, VERY highly educated.
    .
    Cerise

  22. This is hilarious. I followed the exact same google trail as you did to the Slice sight (just read jazz, I’m a little slow when it comes to trends). And I took google another step to find this page. Of course this blog is dead, but thought I’d give a quick amen.

    By the way I went to college and worked in Milwaukee for 8 years. I was part of exciting ministries that reached hundreds of needy people and are growing to this day. As a leader in these ministries I can honestly say that VCY is dead in it’s own community. This is the honest opinion of every Christian leader I came across, and I trust these guys because the Spirit is there, and more importantly the fruit is evident in their ministries.

    Perhaps there are a few VCY crackpots in Milwaukee who think they are doing good by sneaking into the ghetto at 10AM on a Saturday morning to quickly slip tracts under doors to x their “evangelism” box on their Ingrid checklist. We actually saw them do that on morning after spending hours building a new fence at the Hispanic outreach center (they looked nice in their ironed shirts and ties, but their speech and actions reminded me of rabbits being hunted). I got a nice tract, and was told how my life would change if I read it and listened to VCY… I painted it brown with my paintbrush.

    I digress…this is a good blog, I will visit again.

  23. 3 From the Archives strikes back.

    Remember fundies? Remember when I cared about them? Good times.

  24. Chad,
    Growing up an extreme fundie, (think Los Angeles Baptist College)there is something that makes me fighting mad about the crap that comes from slice but for the sake of not waisting my time, I just move on. Ingrid no longer takes comments, she excluded a ton of mine and would not even engage otherwise. I guess if 1957 rolls back around again she will be perfectly poised to make a difference. nah, probably not.

  25. Oh, I’ve given up her long ago.

    I just stumbled across this post and was amazed and amused by my passion about this subject, circa three-ish years ago.

    I just couldn’t possibly care less these days. :)

  26. Oh you’ll care.

    You’ll care when we maliciously stir up a fundie protest against some minor point of alluded doctrine in the next Dailies album as part of a carefully planned marketing campaign.

    Outrage marketing, here we come.

    It’s very similar to what JC did back when they tried their “Skittles are made from orphaned puppy tears” campaign. Man, that guy’s a genius.

  27. Wow, she’s still going at it, yeah? Good for her…

    Chad, 3 years ago you cared about helping the fundies and I called myself Morphea and was, apparently, a lot funnier. Effing 30s.

  28. Oh yes… I sent you Signal Chain, didn’t I? I know the lyric of which you speak. Mike… don’t you know that song’s about music, not God!

    Hehe… I’m gonna have my cake AND eat it all, this time.

  29. Hey, no sneaky allusions to potentially fascinating song lyrics made more mysterious by the promise of controversy if you don’t intend to share.

  30. Oh… I intend to share. :) I’m actually going to start posting the demos on our website in the next couple of days, which will be accompanied by an update here at Addison.

  31. Chad has decided to very tenuously embrace the “open process” model of art-ing.

  32. “arting?”

  33. yes June, maybe you’ve heard of it. It’s what we artsy types do.

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